Ancient Paths Blog: Satire

Quotable ...

"If you want a strong marriage you've got to maintain it... The grass is not greener on the other side of the fence; it's greener where you water it." Rick Warren
"Let the fires go out in the boiler room of the church and the place will still look smart and clean, but it will be cold. The Prayer Room is the boiler room for its spiritual life." Leonard Ravenhill
"...the providence of God is ususally something you should roll with." Doug Wilson
"Saying Yes to happiness often means saying No to yourself." Elizabeth Elliot
"Idols are often good things turned into a god thing, which is a bad thing." Mark Driscoll
"My memory is nearly gone, but I remember two things - that I am a great sinner and that Christ is a great Savior." John Newton
"I believe in Christianity like I believe the sun has risen. Not only because I see it, but because by it I see everything else." C.S. Lewis
"If you pray well, you will live well; if you live well, you will die well; and if you die well, all will be well." St. Augustine
"As the Lord's Prayer is the Prayer of prayers, and the Ten Commandments are the Laws of law, so the Apostles' Creed is the Creed of creeds." Philip Schaff, Creeds of Christendom
"If people like you and me find much that we don't naturally like in the public & corporate side of Christianity all the better for us: it will teach us humility and charity towards simple low-brow people who may be better Christians than ourselves." C.S. Lewis
"Adam and Eve were created to be one flesh, to express in bodily form the unity that exists among the persons of the Trinity." Peter Leithart
"If anything has been lost from our culture, it is the idea that human beings are privately, personally, individually, ultimately, inexorably accountable to God for their lives." R.C. Sproul
"The kindness of the world is far more formidable than its enmity. Many, who were prepared to stem the torrent of its opposition, have yielded with compromising indulgence to its paralyzing kindness." Charles Bridges
"Once you have made the World an end, and faith a means, you have almost won your man, and it makes very little difference what kind of worldly end he is pursuing." Screwtape to Wormwood
"Prayer isn't everything; but everything is done through prayer." -- Armin Gesswein
"God whispers to us in our pleasures, speaks in our conscience, but shouts in our pains: it is His megaphone to rouse a deaf world." -- C.S. Lewis
"Where there is much prayer, there will be much of the Spirit; where there is much of the Spirit, there will be ever-increasing prayer." -- Andrew Murray
"The church that multiplies committees and neglects prayer may be fussy, noisy, enterprising, but it labors in vain and spends its strength for nothing. It is possible to excel in mechanics and fail in dynamics. There is an abundance of machinery; what is lacking is power." -- Samuel Chadwick
"The church is a Body, not a business. It is an organism, not an organization! It is a family to be loved, not a machine to be engineered, and not a company to be managed." -- Rick Warren
"If you don't know where you are going, you will wind up somewhere else." -- Yogi Berra

Satire

January 25, 2010

The Trijicon Controversy: Who Would Jesus Shoot?

Mention the Trijicon controversy among Christians and some will think you're referring to some obscure theological crisis long since covered with the dust of history. On the contrary, this little mentioned story in recent news illustrates the inevitable overlap between politics and religion; church and state.

Continue reading "The Trijicon Controversy: Who Would Jesus Shoot?" »

Posted at 09:00 AM in Culture, Current Affairs, Current Events, Religion, Satire | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBack (0)

October 29, 2009

A Baptist Baptism You've Probably Never Seen!

A Bapist baptism you've probably never seen - I've heard of immersion but...

Comments:

1. Yeah - how do you handle a kid who's excited about being baptised!?

2. The pastor's reaction betrays the fact that for Baptists, baptism is sacred and not to be trifled with. (When it comes to the Lord's Supper, that's another matter.)

Posted at 09:06 AM in Doing Church, Ministry, Religion, Satire, Theology, Worship | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBack (0)

March 29, 2009

The World of the Bible: Factual or Fantastic?

How influenced are you by the scientific mindset? Is science or scripture the pathway to truth? When they conflict which do you choose? Here's a challenge for you:

Did you know that the Bible teaches that unicorns once inhabited the world? Of course the English Bible you read today does not mention them, but the Bible your grandparents grew up with does!

Continue reading "The World of the Bible: Factual or Fantastic?" »

Posted at 05:33 PM in Books, Religion, Satire, Science, Theology | Permalink | Comments (1) | TrackBack (0)

July 09, 2008

Our New Missional Name

At the recent denominational meeting of the Baptist General Conference members were treated to the unveiling of a new ministry emphasis. Wizards of marketing in the employ of our corporate office have cast us in a new light. We are now Converge Worldwide.

"And there was silence in heaven for about half an hour..." Revelation 8:1.

There was also silence among the delegates and attenders, no doubt accompanied by looks of puzzlement and stupefaction. But our leaders had anticipated this

Continue reading "Our New Missional Name" »

Posted at 11:45 AM in Doing Church, Evangelicalism, Ministry, Satire | Permalink | Comments (2) | TrackBack (0)

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